Talk about downward mobility. Barely 400 years ago my ancestors were selling for crazy amounts –
more than 10 times what a carpenter in Amsterdam made in a year. Now, anybody can buy me for a
measly $13.99 at the local Costco. What in Gaia happened? (By the way, that’s me second from the left
on the bottom shelf.)
We tulips used to be special. No other plant compared to us in terms of color. When we caught a virus,
our coloring became even more spectacular. I have heard talk that my distant forbears came from the
Ottoman Empire, but I have always considered myself to be Dutch. Wooden shoes, dikes, canals,
windmills, and tulips are my country’s icons. Field after field of my siblings and cousins – well,
greenhouse after greenhouse. Still, that’s a whole lot better than hoping that somebody stocking up for
a Super Bowl party decides to take me home and still has enough room left in her shopping cart.
That’s if I survive long enough to wind up in a shopping cart. I wonder if the people running this store
even realize that I need sunshine and water. Come to think of it, I have been pretty thirsty for a while.
And don’t get me started on the kids.
I am going back to sleep. Wake me up when I am in some soil.
